lightthedarkness: (Usagi) (Think think think)
Usagi Tsukino ☾ Eternal Sailor Moon ([personal profile] lightthedarkness) wrote2021-09-01 07:29 pm
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survivalthroughhate: ([TCW 51] How dare you)

[personal profile] survivalthroughhate 2021-11-22 09:36 am (UTC)(link)
[He did grin a little at Usagi's blunt words.] Only when teaching or meditating. [The former because it was the exact opposite of how Sidious had taught him and the latter because the Force just made it so much easier for him to access parts of himself that he normally had trouble bringing into focus.]

That's because I don't think you've ever used your hands to try and claw someone's eyes out. [Maul, Maul, Maul. He really needed to work on his conflict resolution skills.

He scowled at what Usagi told him to do.]


I am not at that point yet. People keep saying how I should care about everyone else around me but I just don't. And I don't understand how they do it either. I care about some people. I care about you, my family, and my friends. But people as a whole? [He shook his head.] I don't know how to do that and feel no need to.
survivalthroughhate: ([Comics 35] Grumble)

[personal profile] survivalthroughhate 2021-11-23 08:40 am (UTC)(link)
This is true. I've seen it enough times to know that by now. [When Usagi wanted someone dead, there was no traces left of them to be found afterwards. Maul himself was an example of that.]

What do you suggest then? I hardly think anyone is going to want me to help them rebuild after what they saw. They're all terrified of me now. [He said grumpily, a stubborn expression on his face. This "actions have consequences" thing was really starting to become a pain. He preferred the days when he just cut huge swathes of death and destruction without ever a care for what trauma he left in his wake for those that survived his wrath.]
survivalthroughhate: ([TCW 16] Grrrr)

[personal profile] survivalthroughhate 2021-11-26 05:38 am (UTC)(link)
[Maul scowled and sunk back into the couch. Before, when he did something wrong, he just moved on and never thought about it again. Now, seeing the aftermath of what happened tended just to make him more annoyed than feeling in a charitable mood to fix what he'd done.]

.....I'll think about it.

[That was all he was willing to offer at this time.]

Let us speak of something else.
survivalthroughhate: ([TPM 39] Pensive)

[personal profile] survivalthroughhate 2021-12-02 07:47 am (UTC)(link)
[Maul was grateful she indulged him when he wanted a change of subject.]

Oh? How goes that? Force Healing is a difficult art, or so it is said in the old books I have read, and one only those on the Light Side are said to possess. But I’ve no doubt he’ll be good at it once he can learn how to do it well.
survivalthroughhate: ([TCW 3] Gentle smile)

[personal profile] survivalthroughhate 2021-12-04 10:04 am (UTC)(link)
Don't discount your contributions too much. He wouldn't have had the first idea where to start unless you pointed him in the right direction.

[Maul is here for all the times his friends need to hear compliments when they can't love themselves.]

People are foolish and that is something neither of you can cure, I am afraid. I let you heal me all the time and I am better off for it.
survivalthroughhate: ([TCW 80] Death is what I know)

[personal profile] survivalthroughhate 2021-12-08 05:29 am (UTC)(link)
That is the opposite of what the Sith believe. It is told that the Force is there to serve the wielders, not the other way around. I was taught to bend the Force to my will, to make it obey me and become its master. [But between Usagi and Vyng, he's had quite a bit to think about recently regarding the whole way that he approaches the Force. Then the second half of what she says hits him.] You never told me before that you can transfer your powers to someone else.

[But given Maul's obsession with gaining power and how he'd stolen her heart in Deerington, he knows there are good reasons why Usagi likely wouldn't want him to know about that particular ability.]

If people don't take you up on the offer, then that's their prerogative to be foolish. You can't force people to do what is best for them no matter how hard you try.

[Maul's relationship with her is proof enough of that already.]
survivalthroughhate: ([TCW 4] Looking up)

[personal profile] survivalthroughhate 2021-12-08 06:39 am (UTC)(link)
I....don't know. I'm not sure I know how. [To ask the Force to help him instead of demanding that it do what he asked was something he would have been taught from the time he was a child if he had been taken by the Jedi but it's a skill he feels is still beyond him right now.] Maybe I'll ask Obi-Wan sometime.

[If he can stand to be around the Jedi long enough to be taught anything. Sometimes, his old hatred does make that a bit harder even if he's getting better about tolerating his old foe's presence much better.]

Hmmmm, yes, there is much about you I don't know. [He admits. Maul could be terribly self-centered about that but he is trying to make an effort to ask after Usagi more often.] I am trying to be better about that.

I won't lie and say that doesn't make me burn with curiosity at what might happen if either occurred. [Sailor Maul? Darth Moon?

Maul's eyes soften up in expression and he leans in, gently pressing his forehead up against her's since his hands are still being painted.]


You already do so much to help people even if you're not physically healing them. Just look at me. How many people in this town have already written me off as some psychopathic monster that will only ever be interested in hurting others? I've been waiting for you to do the same and it's never happened and I'm all the better for it.
survivalthroughhate: ([TCW 3] Gentle smile)

[personal profile] survivalthroughhate 2022-01-07 07:33 am (UTC)(link)
It might decide to never obey me ever again? [Maul pointed out. He felt he had to order the Force around because asking would just seem like weakness and then he would no longer be able to access the abilities that were so much a part of himself it would feel not being able to breathe to be without them.

Maul listened and went completely silent as Usagi told him of what having her power would be like and as she ran her hands over his skin. To be honest, it sounded so fantastic as to be overwhelming if all that she said was true. Yet he still was intrigued by the idea, of having that much power at his fingertips, to be able to accomplish whatever he wanted. Would it finally be enough, that much power, to satisfy the ache inside of him? To finally silence the voice that kept telling him that only by having enough power would he feel safe, secure, and be able to protect all those that he loved? He wasn't sure and still his mind ached for that kind of power that Usagi could provide.]


Maybe....maybe that would finally be enough.

[Usagi would know what he meant. He had told her all about his quest and obsession for power, how he thought that enough would finally give his mind peace and stop him from always going onwards and wanting more.

He smiled back at her a little bit.]


You just need to keep telling me that every day until I completely believe it. [He wasn't even joking about that. Maul was so afraid of people leaving him that he needed to be told over and over again that they wouldn't until it became a reality.]
survivalthroughhate: ([TPM 50] Hooded darkness)

[personal profile] survivalthroughhate 2022-01-14 10:42 am (UTC)(link)
[Maul frowned. He knew that Usagi was right, of course, but it didn't make the thought any easier to bear. It was one thing to know he didn't have enough power right now to do all that he wished to but the idea that he'd have it for only a short time before having to give it back was unbearable. He knew that such a thing would eat him up inside and he'd become obsessive over having it once again.]

Perhaps you are right. Maybe it is better not to know at all. [He pauses and flexes his claws, examining the color now painted onto them.] Besides, it is a bit of a moot point. I am sure you would need a good reason to give me such power and fortunately we have no dire reason to do so right now in town.

[With what came each month though, Maul wasn't certain such a moment would sneak up on them despite all their best efforts.]
survivalthroughhate: ([TCW 32] Advice)

[personal profile] survivalthroughhate 2022-01-18 07:02 am (UTC)(link)
Yes. We can. But later on.

[Maul's not in a good headspace to be asking the Force anything when he's still fuming over the fact he didn't kill Lance and how exhausted his body still is physically.]

But hopefully not for a very long, long time.